A wormseye

This is offered in the spirit of the playground pusher: try it, little girl, you might like it. The Worm’s eye View column is normally available only to Wrap subscribers. On the other hand, there is a promotion on at the moment, which lets you get four weeks free. For those who are allergic to signing up for anything, here is a one week only free offer:

What would it be like to live in a world where health — and not just life — could be prolonged at will? Who would we kill to make room for us, the lucky ones? No one ever imagines what it would be like to live in a world where it is other people have their lives almost eternally prolonged, and we, the imaginers, who must die in the ordinary way. That’ s remarkable, because the thing we can’t or don’t imagine is in fact the condition of most of the people alive in the world right now, who know from their television sets, how much better and longer life might be.

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David Austin 1935-2005

Funny people aren’t always nice, and they don’t often feel the need, in person, to make you feel the world is a better place than you’d supposed. David Austin did that.

I don’t know whether his cartoons or his company were more cheering and he was also enormously funny. I never saw him regularly after I stopped drinking with the Spectator crowd, though sometimes we would bump into each other at the Guardian. This is one of his pictures, bought at a show in 1994. I asked him if I could use it as my Christmas card that year. I wish I’d never had to use it for this.

A Flying bishop in his flying palace, on the M25.
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Slashdotted

And it’s not even my bandwidth but the Guardian’s. I read Slashdot with the comment threshold at four, which cuts out most of the crap, but even there you find someone complaining that there was no mention of Richard Stallman. Free software is not a cure for restrictive IP. It’s an inflammatory reaction.

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An experiment in generosity

Magnatune” lets customers choose, within limits, how much they want to pay for music. But everyone knows that half goes to the artist. This seems to me good business and good psychology — surely people will pay more when they know that it is in a good cause? But the transaction is anonymous. There is no way for the artist in question to know to whom they should be (pathetically, snivellingly) grateful. How much do we value the gratitude of those we help? Well, an experiment was made. The front page was changed to say that the artist would be told who had given them how much. Immediately, the average price paid rose by 25%; but the number of people buying anything at all dropped by 35%. I think this shows that many of the customers believed that they were ripping off the artists at the old price, and were ashamed to have it known. they would rather rip them off entirely, by listening to the music stream, and not paying anything, than have it be known how little they were really prepared to pay. An interesting example of the internalisation of norms: we have just enough generosity to make us ashamed, but not enough to make us generous. This could be generalise dto other virtues.

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A Jack Vance Restaurant

I was introduced yesterday to the most absurd and delightful Chinese patisserie in Soho, possibly in Europe. The exterior walls are sheets of blue glass; even the urinals seem made from slabs of blue perspex, with a stepped slate trough for the handbasin. In the cellar is a restaurant, which looks crowded, dark, and painfully hip and on the airy ground floor dim sum and patisserie from another, very prosperous galaxy. You can get things like Cactus Biscotti, or the “Jade Ganache” that I had, which turns out to contain a sort of absinthe trifle enclosed in a cup made of eggshell-thin chocolate decorated to look like enamelled metal, and topped with pistachio-coloured cream that tasted of something quite pleasant but from another solar system where the fundamental chemistry of life is different.

There is a three page tea menu, with the Chinese teas grouped into colours — Green, White, Black, and — the largest section — blue. I shared two pots, one of which was utterly sublime. At £4.00 a pot, it bloody well should have been, but that was comparatively cheap. There was one tea which cost £28. The nibbles and the dim sum were priced to match the drinks. Wearying of tea, I ordered a glass of mandarin jiuice with chili, mint and lemon grass. It was the best fruit juice concoction I have ever drunk but the grass was absolutely crammed with ice, and it cost three pounds.

Central London is full of places charging extraordinary prices for quite ordinary pleasures: the fancy hotel opposite the BBC in Portland Place sells a small, single expresso for £5.20. You might as well be drinking printer ink. Afternoon tea in a grand hotel can easily cost £25 per person and it won’t be nearly as good as you might find in the right bit of the provinces. Do any English people eat tea at all nowadays?

This place, which feels so gratifyingly like the best restaurant on one of Jack Vance’s planets, actually delivers some fun for your money. Poking around the reviews, it would appear that the cellar restaurant does not. Pop round for tea in the afternoon, is my advice.

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Gmail is not a word processor

I was bewildered by Vic Keegan’s article on gmail as a word processor; I should have been illuminated. It shows how many journalists still use a computer as a typewriter with fancy formatting.

He wants a fast and lightweight program with which to process words. Don’t we all? Word is too big for him, and OOo too nerdy. The plain text editors, he’s heard of aren’t powerful enough. ”I’ve tried a few free ‘memo pads’ but they are primitive as they do not want to provide competition for paid-for alternatives”

So now he writes his articles as gmail messages, because it has the “word processing” features that he needs —

“seven fonts and four type sizes (including huge) plus colour, bold, italic, indenting, justification and quite a good spell checker.
It also has a link button of the kind you get on blogs, which inserts a hypertext link to a website behind a word you have highlighted without the need to type in any code. The only thing it seriously lacks is a word counter.”

Absolutely none of these, except a word count and, perhaps, for a link button, would be on my list of essential text editing functions. My lightweight word processor needs only have:

  • movement by word, sentence and paragraph
  • deletion by the same units, forward and backward
  • a function to cycle through upper, lower, and title case
  • the ability to transpose the two characters either side of the cursor
  • drag and drop cutting and pasting
  • word count
  • spell chicking
  • autosave
  • a format that can be indexed for fast later searching in old articles.

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Another patent story I missed

OK – I only found it after the deadline. But some idiot in the US Patent Office has approved one for “a flying saucer which depends on antigravity.” In a way, that’s almost more shocking than patents on hyperlinks.

Posted in nördig | 4 Comments

That Sony rootkit

I have a big piece on IP going into Saturday’s Guardian. I’m not very happy about it, because I think it misses an important point about Sony’s rootkit, one of the most egregious examples of corporates taking ownership of things we consider our own, like the computers we have bought.

It is going to be a huge PR disaster for Sony, since the software opens one security hole, the removal kit another, even bigger one; and the whole thing turns out to be a violation of copyright itself, since it contains, in a delicious irony, portions of the (copyright protected) DVD-playing program that got the Norwegian teenager Jan Johansen pursued into court by the record industry.

But only this afternoon did I see the really important point. This wasn’t aimed at consumers at all. The particular target appears to have been Apple (some of the stolen GPL code was there to detect Apple software). They really did not want these songs ripped to iPods. The customers’ computers were merely the battlefield for these two unlovely corporations to fight their DRM wars on.

Posted in nördig | 2 Comments

Different from Kipling, how?

There is a long plug/interview with Robert Kaplan in the Atlantic Monthly online (not sure if it’s paywalled) which fills me with a soft despair. Here’s why:

Instead of the oppressive colonial domination that characterized other empires, Kaplan describes America as spreading its imperial influence through humanitarian aid efforts such as well-digging, medical care, and school construction. These days, imperialism means that soldiers seek to adapt to the mores of the places where they’re stationed, rather than forcing those places to knuckle under to imported ideas. Green Berets in Afghanistan wear keffiyas and grow beards; they drink tea with tribal leaders and take time to know both people and place. Instead of fierce generals or conquest-hungry marauders, Kaplan found thoughtful, caring, and disciplined soldiers who everyday face the impossible task of “making countries out of places that were never meant to be countries.”

I’m quite prepared to accept this as sometimes true, and always, among the decent imperialists, an aspiration, though perhaps a naive one: I don’t remember, from childhood visits to the unimaginable profusions of the PX in Bonn, very much engagement with the German culture around it. And let’s leave Iraq out of the picture for the moment, though it is the central front in the American imperialist project. The most astonishing thing is Kaplan’s assertion that these “thoughtful, caring, and disciplined soldiers” are unlike all their predecessors. What does he think the British empire was like, or even the French? That phrase about making countries out of places that were never meant to be countries translates quite well into French — I think it would be something like La mission civilisatrice. And the idea of our brave soldiers accepted by their brave enemies is one that everyone finds irresistible, whenever they invade Afghanistan. The wars there all seem to have the same outcome, though.

This isn’t (just) point scoring. If American can’t even acknowledge its predecessor empires, let alone learn from their mistakes, what chance does it have of avoiding their fate?

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The Wall Street Journal comes out for torture

The Wall Street Journal has come out for torture in its leader on Saturday:

“Yet according to many Bush Administration critics, the aggressive and stressful questioning techniques used successfully against the likes of KSM put the U.S. on a slippery slope to widespread ‘torture’ and the prisoner abuses at Abu Ghraib. John McCain (R., Arizona) has pushed an amendment through the Senate that would effectively bar all stressful interrogation techniques. The danger for American security is that this would telegraph to every terrorist in the world that he has absolutely nothing to fear from silence should he fall into U.S. hands.”

updated after the fold

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