talking to morons

I wnet to get my hair cut yesterday and when I got home my wife and daughter laughed more usual. It turns out the hairdresser has done her best, with very defective materials, to give me a mullet. Behind my ears an inch of ratty fringe curtains the back of my neck. I know I didn’t ask for this, but I think I’ve worked out why I got it: when she asked how I wanted the back done — after I had told her to cut it off my ears — I said “proportionately”. This is not a term in the vocabulary of a Saffron Walden hairdresser.